Middle age is a time to embrace life. But how many people complain their life is half over? Could it be our lives are half beginning? Is it possible, in the words of a famous song, "the best is yet to come."
A friend once told me, we know we’re middle-aged when we understand every Beatles lyric because we’ve lived it. It is true. There is something that is deeply soulful and spiritual about middle age.
Our younger years are full of stormy emotions, the inevitability of loss, the fierce and blinding passions of love. We learn in middle age to let go of our illusions, to accept our imperfections and to allow life’s wisdom to quietly wash over our souls.
The middle of the road is a great place to be. It can be a remarkable time of transformation and discovery. We have our greatest chance to reflect on the journey and forge ahead to the next bend in the road, which could yield our greatest adventures and discoveries.
It is a matter of perspective. Some people worry how much time they have left. Others view the middle years as an opportunity to start a second career, travel to new places and grow spiritually.
We have a choice of sitting on the sidelines or getting in the game and being a real participant in our life’s adventures.
The Zen belief that age and wisdom lead to transformation needs to replace the Western notion that we hit the wall when we reach 40. Instead of having a mid-life crisis, isn’t it just as easy to have a mid-life revelation? Even if we can’t climb the mountain, can we not see the stars and moonlight that shimmer over the horizon?
I feel our spiritual vision is enhanced by middle age. This can be a remarkably creative time to meditate, enjoy nature and ponder our place in the cosmic universe. Just because our bodies have slowed down does not mean that we have stopped spiritually evolving.
In the process of slowing down, we see things more clearly. Today, I take long walks in the woods, listen to the surf pound the sand, and really pay attention to life’s rhythms. I read the poets and philosophers for truth and serenity. I explore the teachings of other spiritual traditions for greater understanding and wisdom.
I was raised Catholic, but feel my spiritual universe as a middle-aged woman is not limited by one faith or bounded in doctrine I can’t weave into my daily life. I personally find simple wisdom in Eastern beliefs — a way to become a more compassionate human and a more loving member of the universe.
I have also realized my happiness comes from doing meaningful work that has spiritual value. I no longer wish to work for people who place profit ahead of human lives. Like so many others in mid-life, I have discovered new talents and passions, and ways to nourish my creative spirit.
Now I try to surround myself with soulful people. We share our stories and help one another to keep the faith, in our work and in our lives. One friend is an artist who has her own studio but never feels it is a waste of time to help other artists. She inspires me with her passion for her work and her commitment to other struggling artists. She truly "walks the walk" in the deepest spiritual sense.
Another friend endured several painful breakups. Even though her heart was mangled each time someone left her, she found a spiritual inner wisdom that made her a more expressive writer. When I read her poetry and short stories, I am touched by the fearless humor, humanity and dignity she expresses in her heartfelt narratives.
I know another, a man who felt trapped in a passionless 20-year marriage. Even though divorce shook up his life, he started to take inventory of all that really mattered. He became a better father to his children. He started doing all the things he felt afraid to do while he was married to a woman who never understood his creative drive. Now he is writing books, and leading men’s groups, and feeling, in mid-life, a deeper connection with his spiritual side.
I believe we all have our stories, and our life journeys are enriched when we share our struggles and our spiritual lessons. I am blessed to have many spiritual mentors in my life. These people are more than just friends. They are living, breathing reminders that when we reach the middle of the road, our life is far from over.
Maybe it is just beginning.
Terry Loncaric is a Chicago freelance writer. She is the author of The Healing Powers of Laughter (Abbey Press).